So, another Mother's day has come and gone. I know for many of you it was a difficult day. Perhaps it was the first Mother's day you celebrated without your Mom because they recently transitioned back to the realm of Spirit, or perhaps Mother's day continues to be challenging for you because you didn't or don't have the best relationship with your Mom.
It's the latter to whom I'd like to speak in this moment.
The relationship between Mother and child is unlike any other relationship we have.
It sets the stage for our very existence! From the moment we enter her womb, we are marinating in the psychological, emotional and spiritual environment of our Mother as well as the energies of her external environment.
All of this takes up residence within our being on a cellular level, long before we make our entrance into the world.
And once we take that first breath of air into our lungs, then begins the earthly journey of our relationship with our Mom.
It takes time to heal the harm that was done if your relationship with the woman who gave you life was toxic and abusive, and/or lacking in some way, shape or form.
Messages which said you were unlovable, a burden, damaged and/or weird, too much, unwanted all become deeply ingrained and embedded within the marrow of your soul and within your physical, emotional and energetic bodies as well.
So, when holidays such as Mother's day roll around, it's understandable that you would have a challenging time.
It's understandable that posts of smiling Mothers with their children exclaiming 'Happy Mother's Day" may make you bristle inside, or touch that cavern of grief and longing for the Mother you never had.
It's understandable if you may judge the commercialism of the holiday rather than focusing on the beauty of the meaning behind the celebration as a subtle way of avoiding and feeling your heartache and pain.
It's understandable that you may hold your breath until the clock finally hits 12 MN and a new day has dawned, signaling the end of the Mother's day holiday.
Here's what I'd like to offer that will hopefully be of service to you not just when the next Mother's day rolls around, but in the here and now.
Just for a moment, oblige me and close your eyes.
Recall an image of yourself as a little girl or little boy...got it?
Ok great :-)
Now see yourself as you are right now as an adult and imagine yourself sitting in a place that feels safe and nurturing to you, wherever that may be.
When you have settled into that place, I want you to invite the little you to come and sit on your lap.
Once she or he is nestled there, I just want you to do one simple thing.
First and foremost look him or her directly in the eyes and say these 3 simple words..."I see you".
And as you repeat this I want you to pour into those 3 words all the love, compassion, tenderness, warmth, and kindness you can muster.
And then say These 3 words...."I love you" with as much heart sincerity to which you can genuinely connect and feel.within yourself.
You can repeat these two phrases as many times as you feel moved to do so. And when the words come to a natural place of rest and silence, let your little girl or little boy lay their head on your chest, and hold them in a loving embrace for as long as your heart so desires.
For those of us who didn't have nurturing relationships with our biological mothers when we were children, we get an amazing gift that others don't....the opportunity to Mother ourselves.
And it is a gift, because we can love on ourselves exactly the way we wished we had been loved when we were children.
We get to pour into our Being all of the goodness we should have and deserved to receive as a child, without limitation.
As you begin to heal your Mother wound, holidays such as Mother's day won't be as difficult or challenging.
Because you will have learned to nourish your inner child and fill that void within your heart and soul, you'll be able to join others as they joyously celebrate the relationship they have with their Mother without feeling jealous, resentful and/or sad.
No, this healing doesn't happen overnight, but it is totally possible!
It has taken me most of my life to learn how to Mother myself, but I can say that today the Mother wound which was created when my mother committed suicide when I was just 8 year's old, and which once swallowed me whole, no longer hurts as it did before.
The same healing is possible for you.
Namaste' and Much Love <3