If you were fortunate enough to be raised in a loving environment as a child, where messages of how precious, special and worthy of love you are were sewn into your Spirit, consider yourself blessed.
For those of us who received less than ideal early, childhood messaging, toxic ones such as ‘You’re unwanted, not lovable, unworthy of being seen and/or heard, don’t matter, you’re a burden....etc. etc....this is for you.
As children we came into this world fresh, full of innate love, light, wonder and innocence.
Like sponges we absorbed our early childhood experiences and the messaging we received about who we are. Those messages became deeply embedded within the marrow of our heart, mind, body and soul and still inform how we move in the world today.
Depending on the severity of those early, toxic messages and also whether it was coupled with experiences of abuse and/or neglect, it can take a lifetime to heal, rewire and release them. Our child-hood experiences set the stage for how we feel about ourselves and subsequently move in life and in our relationships with others.
As you take steps in your healing process to replace those unhealthy, limiting, old messages with ones which more accurately tell the truth of who you are, ones which nurture and support your Being, old, damaging tapes may unexpectedly rear their ugly heads again.
Someone may trigger you or remind you of your primary caregiver/s and bring to the surface very familiar feelings of not being good enough, un-loveable...or any other toxic messages you imbibed
as a child.
And then turn your attention inward and acknowledge all of the things you love about yourself.
Your mind may object by pointing out aspects of yourself that are still a work in progress by saying “Yeah but you haven’t changed this or that or you’re still having a problem with this..”
Simply thank it for its input, acknowledge the truth that those are still areas on which you’re working (so no denial or by-passing what’s still need of healing within you) and then SWIFTLY return to relishing all that is wonderful about yourself.
In those moments what’s needed is loving kindness and self- compassion, not self- judgement and self-criticism.
Keep it real, honest and genuine. Acknowledge and validate all that is to be celebrated about yourself.
It doesn’t have to be some monumental feat that you’ve accomplished, (although that is most certainly allowed as well :-) ), but it can be something as simple and special as loving the sound of your deep, belly laugh or the way you can bake a sweet potato pie that will make someone wanna slap their Mama” :-)!
The point is you must love your inner child now.
You can give him or her the love and nurturing they should have received but unfortunately did not when you were young.
Gradually these new messages of authentic Self-love will begin to flourish within you and cleanse out any residual, harmful messages which are poisonous to your Being.
It may seem as if you will never come to a place of real Self-love, but I promise you as long as you do the work to heal the wounding of your inner child, you most certainly will!
Don’t give up!
And if no-one has told you today that you are loved, know that I see you and even if we’ve never personally met, I’m holding space for yours and my inner child and the precious, adult Being we are today.